A Mother's Spiritual Diary

"I have a great devotion to the
Most Holy Trinity"

The Trinitarian character of Conchita's whole life and of all her teachings is one of the most admirable and profound aspects of her spirituality.

The blossoming in her of baptism, and the progressive development of personal grace under the action of the Holy Spirit, impel her to identification with, transformation into Christ-Priest and Victim for continuing her oblation of love to the glory of the Father on behalf of men. Conchita's entire spiritual life expanded under the sign of the Trinity.

From the very first pages of her Diary there stands out a call of grace which carries her on toward the profundities of the inmost life of God. To the measure she advances in the spiritual life, she receives special lights, and comes to the full life of union, the action of the gifts of intelligence and wisdom, she immerses herself in the abysses of the Trinity.

The pages Conchita wrote on the Trinity are the most sublime of her Diary, they would fill a whole book. We have been obliged, regretfully, to extract only part of the text of the treasure of her teachings.

Great devotion to the Most Holy Trinity

Her vital relationship with the divine Persons follows a constantly ascending course.

From the very beginnings of her spiritual life, the Lord led her in a very conscious and practical way to orient her life to the glory of the Holy Trinity. He told her: "Fill your life, hour by hour, without thinking of what comes later, as if it were your last hour; fill it, abandoning yourself to My will, seeking only to please Me. Repeat this: May Your will be done, oh Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Glory to You Most Holy Trinity" (Diary, 1893).

The vision of the Cross of the Apostolate - symbol of the spirituality and of the teachings of the Cross - is wholly enveloped in a profound Trinitarian sense. Conchita glimpses this, and, turning to Jesus, writes: "... the Father by His approval, You fastened to the Cross, and the Holy Spirit as Protector... the whole Trinity is going to direct this Work" (Diary, March 1894).

The result of this sanctifying action of God is shown in Conchita who wrote a short time later:

"Here I am wholly immersed in God. I have a great devotion to the Most Holy Trinity. I have consecrated these three days to Him with all my soul. Yesterday, the Father... today Jesus... and tomorrow the Holy Spirit, whom I love so much. I have often felt Him inclined over me with His rays of light, making me experience an ineffable sensation which lulls me, enchants me and fills me with an unction which transports me" (Diary, May 19, 1894 ).

"The Whole Trinity is Love"

From the central perspective of her personal grace, the mystery of the Cross, Conchita contemplates, in the light of the Holy Spirit, the mystery of this God who turns toward us. It is a capital text, for from the beginning, it gives us the key to the interpretation of the whole doctrine of the Cross:

"The substance of the Father is Love and so great is this love for man that He gave His own Son to redeem the world. 'The substance of the Son is Love and a love so great, for the Father and for men, that He gave Himself up to suffering to save them, for the honor of the Father. As for Me, the third Person, My substance is Love, in concordance with the Father and the Son for the glory of the Trinity, taking part in the mystery of the Incarnation, accompanying Jesus throughout his life, attesting to His divinity and sealing the work of Redemption, protecting the Church, My immaculate Spouse.

"The substance of the Father is Love and might. My substance is Love and life, the substance of the Son is Love and suffering. The substance of the Three Divine Persons is Charity, that is, the purest Love which communicates itself. This is why It is called Charity, because of this giving of self. It is the most perfect love.

"Suffering, or the Cross divinized by the Son, is the one and only ladder for reaching to the love of charity. Now do you understand the value of the Cross? Those who are most crucified are those who love the most, since suffering, the emblem of Jesus, draws to it the Three Divine Persons. We dwell in this soul and there I set up my dwelling" (Diary, July 9, 1895).

Trinity and Incarnation

"I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me" (Jn 14:6).

The mystery of the Incarnation led Conchita toward the profundities of God.

"The Lord then raised my Spirit up to the contemplation of the Incarnation of the Word. He made me understand very profound things concerning the Most Holy Trinity, of which He is the Second Person.

"From all eternity the Father existed. He produced from His own depths, from His own substance, from His very essence His Word. From all eternity, too, from the beginning the Word was God, as the Father was God, the two Persons constituting but one divine substance. But never at any moment did these divine Persons, the Father and the Son, exist alone, never were they but two. In the same eternity, though proceeding from the Father and the Son, the Holy Spirit existed, the reflection, substance, essence of the Father and the Son and, equally, Person. The Holy Spirit is a divine reflection on the bosom of Love Itself. He is the reflection of light at the heart of light itself, the reflection of life in the innermost of Life itself, and so of all infinite perfection within the inmost core of eternal perfection.

"This communication of the same substance, of the same essence, of the same life and of the same perfections which form and which are actually one and the same essence, substance, life and perfection, constitute the eternal felicity of one sole God and the endless complacency of the Persons of the august Trinity.

"Oh how great, immensely great, God is! What abysses in Him, incomprehensible for man and even for angels! Before this grandeur, I feel like the tiniest atom. Yet my infinite soul, on feeling capable of receiving a feeble reflection of this same grandeur, expands, fully joyous on contemplating the felicity, the eternity, the incomprehensible immensity of its God.

"And is the Word there? I ask myself, wholly moved, whether it is from this throne He will descend to the vile atom of the earth? Oh my eternal God, how can I accept such condescension?

"Jesus went on: 'The Word, the Second Person of the Most Holy Trinity descended into the most pure womb of Mary and, by operation of the Holy Spirit who made her pregnant, the Word became incarnate and was made man! So profound an abasement as only the love of a God could bring about!'

"I heard about this marvelous and so sublime mystery some things so profound that they are only for my soul, for I cannot explain them to others, for lack of words." (Diary, Feb. 25, 1897).

It must be emphasized that the lights she receives do not result in Conchita having a purely abstract knowledge. There is no question of a speculation about God, but of an experience of love which perceives in the profundity of the inmost life of God the raison d'etre of a love for men extended even to the folly of the Cross.